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Worst Analogies from High School Essays
missangelyss
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2
4-14-2007 6:06 AM
627 views
tags:
analogies
,
english
,
essays
,
humor
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<div style="margin: 12px 0px; font-family: arial; color: #333333; background: #ffffff; border: solid 4px #e5e5e5; width: 100%; clear: left;"><div class="CM_CTB_Content_Wrap" style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px;background-color: #ffffff;"><div style="border-bottom: solid 1px #dcdcdc; white-space: nowrap; margin-bottom: 8px; background-color: #eeeeee ;background-image: url(http://www.clipmarks.com/images/source-bg.gif); background-repeat: repeat-x; height: 24px; line-height: 24px; vertical-align: middle; padding-bottom: 4px; color: #666666; font-size: 10px;" ><a href="http://clipmarks.com/clip-to-blog/" title="see clips that are hot right now"><img src="http://content.clipmarks.com/blog_embed/3e99c9e3-bd60-4202-b0c3-b0d385117d0b/13F6E0E8-C4F9-4540-BCFF-3A627D68BE91/" alt="" width="19" height="19" border="0" style="vertical-align: middle; margin: 0px 4px; display: inline; border: none; float:none;" /></a>clipped from <a title="http://diggfinds.com/2007-03-31/worst-analogies-ever-written-in-a-high-school-essay/" href="http://diggfinds.com/2007-03-31/worst-analogies-ever-written-in-a-high-school-essay/" style="font-size: 11px;">diggfinds.com</a></div><blockquote style="text-align: left; padding: 0px 8px; margin: 4px 0px 8px 0px; background: transparent; border: none;" cite="http://diggfinds.com/2007-03-31/worst-analogies-ever-written-in-a-high-school-essay/"><P>The following are actual winning analogies in the “worst analogies ever written in a high school essay” contest:</P></blockquote><div style="height: 2px; font-size: 2px; background: #dcdcdc; border-bottom: solid 1px #f5f5f5; margin: 2px 4px;"></div><blockquote style="text-align: left; padding: 0px 8px; margin: 4px 0px 8px 0px; background: transparent; border: none;" cite="http://diggfinds.com/2007-03-31/worst-analogies-ever-written-in-a-high-school-essay/"><P>They lived in a typical suburban neighborhood with picket fences that resembled Nancy Kerrigan’s teeth.</P></blockquote><div style="height: 2px; font-size: 2px; background: #dcdcdc; border-bottom: solid 1px #f5f5f5; margin: 2px 4px;"></div><blockquote style="text-align: left; padding: 0px 8px; margin: 4px 0px 8px 0px; background: transparent; border: none;" cite="http://diggfinds.com/2007-03-31/worst-analogies-ever-written-in-a-high-school-essay/"><P>He spoke with the wisdom that can only come from experience, like a guy who went blind because he looked at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it and now goes around the country speaking at high schools about the dangers of looking at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it.</P></blockquote><div style="height: 2px; font-size: 2px; background: #dcdcdc; border-bottom: solid 1px #f5f5f5; margin: 2px 4px;"></div><blockquote style="text-align: left; padding: 0px 8px; margin: 4px 0px 8px 0px; background: transparent; border: none;" cite="http://diggfinds.com/2007-03-31/worst-analogies-ever-written-in-a-high-school-essay/"><P>McBride fell 12 stories, hitting the pavement like a Hefty Bag filled with vegetable soup.</P></blockquote><div style="height: 2px; font-size: 2px; background: #dcdcdc; border-bottom: solid 1px #f5f5f5; margin: 2px 4px;"></div><blockquote style="text-align: left; padding: 0px 8px; margin: 4px 0px 8px 0px; background: transparent; border: none;" cite="http://diggfinds.com/2007-03-31/worst-analogies-ever-written-in-a-high-school-essay/"><P>Her hair glistened in the rain like nose hair after a sneeze.</P></blockquote><div style="height: 2px; font-size: 2px; background: #dcdcdc; border-bottom: solid 1px #f5f5f5; margin: 2px 4px;"></div><blockquote style="text-align: left; padding: 0px 8px; margin: 4px 0px 8px 0px; background: transparent; border: none;" cite="http://diggfinds.com/2007-03-31/worst-analogies-ever-written-in-a-high-school-essay/"><P>Bob was as perplexed as a hacker who means to access T:\flw.quid55328.com\aaakk/ch@ung but gets T:\flw.quidaaak/ch@ng by mistake.</P></blockquote><div style="height: 2px; font-size: 2px; background: #dcdcdc; border-bottom: solid 1px #f5f5f5; margin: 2px 4px;"></div><blockquote style="text-align: left; padding: 0px 8px; margin: 4px 0px 8px 0px; background: transparent; border: none;" cite="http://diggfinds.com/2007-03-31/worst-analogies-ever-written-in-a-high-school-essay/"><P>He was as tall as a six-foot three-inch tree.</P></blockquote><div style="height: 2px; font-size: 2px; background: #dcdcdc; border-bottom: solid 1px #f5f5f5; margin: 2px 4px;"></div><blockquote style="text-align: left; padding: 0px 8px; margin: 4px 0px 8px 0px; background: transparent; border: none;" cite="http://diggfinds.com/2007-03-31/worst-analogies-ever-written-in-a-high-school-essay/"><P>John and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirds who had also never met.</P></blockquote></div><div style="margin: 0px 6px 6px 4px;"><table style="font-size: 11px;border-spacing: 0px;padding: 0px;" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" width="100%"><tr><td style="background:transparent;border-width:0px;padding:0px;"> </td><td align="right" style="background:transparent;border-width:0px;padding:0px;width:107px" width="107"><a href="http://clipmarks.com/share/13F6E0E8-C4F9-4540-BCFF-3A627D68BE91/blog/" title="blog or email this clip"><img src="http://content6.clipmarks.com/images/c2b-foot.png" border="0" alt="blog it" width="107" height="17" style="border-width:0px;padding:0px;margin:0px;" /></a></td></tr></table></div></div>
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