10) A KGB officer is walking in the park and he sees and old Jewish man reading a book.
The KGB says "What are you reading old man?" The old man says "I am trying to teach myself Hebrew."

7) A man saves up his ruples and is finally able to buy a car in Soviet Russia. After he pays his money the he is told he will have his car in three years.
"Three years!" he asks "What month?"
"August"
"August? What day in August?" He asks
"The Second of August" is the reply
"Morning or Afternoon?"
"Afternoon. Why do you need to know?"
"The plumber is coming in the morning."
KGB says "Why are you trying to learn Hebrew? It takes years to get a visa for Israel. You would die before the paperwork got done."
"I am learning Hebrew so that when I die and go to Heaven I will be able to speak to Abraham and Moses. Hebrew is the language they speak in Heaven." the old man replies.
"But what if when you die you go to Hell?" asks KGB.
And the old man replies, "Russian, I already know."