 kankamuso says: A little bit more detailed than the usual "just be yourself", heh. I find that people really like you if you let them talk about themselves. People like to talk about themselves. One simple rule: Don't care. You know, Godfrey, I almost pulled this out just for you: If someone tells you that he does not really care if people like him or not, he simply is not being honest.haha. I see the author did not consult you about this article, unfortunately. But it's a paradox; the less you care, the more you'll be liked--at least by those whom you'll be glad to count as friends. lol bignose, I noticed that too! The one that I most struggle with from this list is remembering names. It's scary. Many times, if someone asked me what their name is 5 seconds after telling me, I wouldn't be able to tell them. I really don't know what my problem is, because i have a good enough memory and i do care. I just totally seem to space when people tell me their name. Same with me, Eric. The reason is that we are fully engaged with the essence of the person, thus the small stuff--like their name--gets brainshelved for later. At least this is my own self analysis. Association, GD. Perhaps you were to tell my your first name was George; I would say to myself at that moment in time "What famous idiot is named George?"; well, you get the idea. Suffice it say that I wouldn't forget your name the next time I met you again. Yeah, I know the tricks, Debby, but I use them sparingly because I don't like having what naturally occurs at a much deeper level overridden. So, after the initial wordless transmissions and receptions and probes and scanning has happened, I simply say, What did you say your name was? We need to have confidence in who we are. I usually find it better to be myself and trust that people will either like me for who I am or not. The problem with techniques for getting people to like you is that the are essentially tricks, tactics and one wonders why, if someone feels like they are a good likeable person why they have to try so hard exactly knowing the name of so. is really helpful people in callcenters will also adress you by your name so you get the impression they are really interested in you... These tips are so superficial! Trying to make a person like you just by pleasing them won't work... People enjoy/seek out conflict so that they can grow so... wonderful clip! the fact remains, that no one set of rules will work for everyone...however, it's good to have a strategy. especially if one doesn't have the receptions and probes and scanning experience... it works like this: don't be afraid to be yourself, but don't be fooled into thinking that everyone is just like you. communication is just translating from 'you'...to 'them'... among all the other cliches in our society, misinterpretation is the number one killer of a good talk. I also have difficulty remembering names, and I'll usually tell new acquaintances I'm introduced to (if I'm interested in developing a friendship) that I am great with numbers but bad with names. Also, that I will be asking them again, to please not be offended. I used to add jokingly that I could probably remember their social security number but not their name, but that was before identity theft became such a prevalent problem. Usually, I'll stop by a few times during an event or party when they're not engaged in conversation and say, "Nancy, right?" or "told you I was bad with names, what was it again???" and thank them and laugh at myself with them. Half the time, they've forgotten m... Welcome to The Clip, Maggie. I'm the same way with numbers. I can remember phone numbers that I haven't called in months, or even years, effortlessly. same here.but i can remember faces but not names.half the friends i have is because i have seen a similarity among the new faces and the faces of friends i have met before. " . . . I don't like having what naturally occurs at a much deeper level overridden. So, after the initial wordless transmissions and receptions and probes and scanning has happened, I simply say, What did you say your name was?" Godfrey Daniel This was truly funny  Nice to see this linked from Lifehacker! http://lifehacker.com/software/personal-relationships/become-more-comfy-in-social-situations-243241.php The source post seems to have disappeared. |
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