If a child shows an early interest in fighting or physical competitive situations, we try to find ways to channel this negative energy, f.i. by looking for sports clubs, martial art schools, etc. And we openly TALK about the bad and good sides of these feelings and energy. We hardly ask ourselves the question if these 'outlets' are appropriate for their age and if we are not pushing them into some kind of mimicking the adult world's aggression. Competition is good. Defending yourself is good. Becoming resilient is good. So channeling a child's darker side is good. We don't feel uncomfortable with that.

Same goes for children who's darker inner feelings, fantasies or energy point to dominanc...

If a child shows an early interest in fighting or physical competitive situations, we try to find ways to channel this negative energy, f.i. by looking for sports clubs, martial art schools, etc. And we openly TALK about the bad and good sides of these feelings and energy. We hardly ask ourselves the question if these 'outlets' are appropriate for their age and if we are not pushing them into some kind of mimicking the adult world's aggression. Competition is good. Defending yourself is good. Becoming resilient is good. So channeling a child's darker side is good. We don't feel uncomfortable with that.

Same goes for children who's darker inner feelings, fantasies or energy point to dominance, having power of ones own life and of others, collecting renown and favors by challenging their friends or getting the highest grades. We channel this energy through educational programs that divide groups by rates and grades. We openly talk about the up- and downsides of high expectations and what responsibilities come with what power. But we do not so much reflect on the big gap between adult understanding of the implications and the wild dreams of children. No, because renown and status is good. Independancy is good. Authority is good. ----->

---->
So, why is it then, that we behave like total goofs when it comes to the third most important, most natural and thus most inevitable part of any child's raw composition: sexual energy.
Why is it that we don't give children any 'outlets' in this? Why do we shamefully take all away what could be constructive, channeling and most important, a way of acknowledging their existence as a sexual relevant and respected being? People should be ashamed, not for this darker energy to exist in children, but because they neglect and frown upon it. Instead of guiding children, just as in the first 2 examples, along their way to maturity.

You can not expect children to become healthy, balanced sexual...

---->
So, why is it then, that we behave like total goofs when it comes to the third most important, most natural and thus most inevitable part of any child's raw composition: sexual energy.
Why is it that we don't give children any 'outlets' in this? Why do we shamefully take all away what could be constructive, channeling and most important, a way of acknowledging their existence as a sexual relevant and respected being? People should be ashamed, not for this darker energy to exist in children, but because they neglect and frown upon it. Instead of guiding children, just as in the first 2 examples, along their way to maturity.

You can not expect children to become healthy, balanced sexual adults when you turn your head away from their earliest sexual energy. It is there. Get over it and act consistent with all your other teachings.

Boy, this really freaks me out, every time.