When dispatched to the scene of a turkey, [Brookline police animal control officer Pierre] Verrier offers advice instead.

He tells people not to feed them, not to be intimidated by them, and to keep their distance. Still, some people cannot help themselves. They need to be near the turkeys.

Distance-shmistance, we want to be near the turkeys. I, for one, am against the city of Boston trying to regulate mutually consensual human-turkey behavior. A light ass-pecking never hurt anyone, am I right?

Even though this incident happened right near my apartment, I have not been lucky enough to experience any super-sized turkeys on my errands, sadly. Look at the size of that sucker...he's gotta be like 12 feet tall!

A light ass-pecking never hurt anyone, am I right?

Not that I know of.

That thing is on roids.

the turkey proceeded to follow the Dorchester woman over the Green Line train tracks,

The turkey is clearly in cahoots with the trains to establish an environment of fear in your neighborhood, Kore. As the trains go, so go the turkeys. Be careful out there, Boston. The trains might be sending a message. My bet is they will attack on Thanksgiving. The turkey is a symbol.

That's why we have Thanksgiving turkey.

This Thanksgiving, the turkeys bite back.

This Thanksgiving, the turkeys bite back.

I knew it! This episode is obviously a viral marketing campaign for the yet-to-be-announced killer turkeys blockbuster movie slated for Thanksgiving 2008.

This reminds me of the South Park episode with the attacking turkeys. Gobble Gobble.

Kore, you're not far from me - I haven't encountered any turkeys near the green line or in the south end...

Very funny. We should really get all Boston-area clippers together for drinks sometime. (In fact, is something still going down this weekend? I'm trying to confirm...)

Dude, it's not just about turkey, and ass, it is about the CULTURE of FEAR!

I must admit, when I read this, I tapped myself in my apartment with visqueen, and I live in China! Why? Because if it could happen in Boston, it could happen anywhere! Help us, Tom Ridge, you're our only hope! We need a color-coded Tureky threat warning system!

Oh, wait a minute, you mean an ACTUAL turkey? Not the country about to invade Iraq to slaughter the Kurds?

...um...

...well, I guess I can take down my visqueen now...

Hmmm, ouyangwulong. Which visqueen exactly do you have in your apartment?

"This Thanksgiving, the turkeys bite back."

I'm sorry, I'm still laughing over this one . . .

Thanksgiving 2008: When Turkeys Attack

January, 2008.

Once they figured out how to use train passes, the Great Poultry Revolution was swift and decisive. Now, the urban turkeys of Boston freely roam the snowy, deserted ruins of the city, pecking any and all who dare show their bottoms around these parts.

You maniacs! You blew it up! Damn you! Damn you all to hell!

[Last known journal entry...]

WTH? Who are the bird-brains changing the link location on me?!

Still, turkeys are better than aliens, yes? There is nowhere to hide, Kore. Nowhere.