2. People who are willing to get off their ass to search the entire room for the T.V. remote because they refuse to walk to the T.V. and change the channel manually.

Unfair - if i find the remote, then i only have to get of my fat ass once.. if i don't find the remote, i have to keep getting up... I'm LAZY

7. When something is 'new and improved!'. Which is it? If it's new, then there has never been anything before it. If it's an improvement, then there must have been something before it, couldn't be new.

However, it could be "Newly Improved"

not sure i agree with many of these, though this one i sure can't argue with...

3. When people say "Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too". Damn right! What good is cake if you can't eat it?

And Cat, i totally agree with your sentiments about the remote control...well said

9. When you are waiting for the bus and someone asks "Has the bus come yet?". If the bus came would I be standing here, dumbass?

that only works if you live in the ass hole of nowhere.. cos I live somewhere which isn't even on google earth, and we still have more than one bus.. so no one is waiting for 'the' bus, and therefore it makes sense to ask if my bus has come yet.

10. When someone says "Let me be honest with you" or starts off saying 'Honestly....'. It implys that most of the things they say is dishonest or are lies!

When you eat your cake... you don't have it anymore.

or you could say that you haven't really had your cake until you've eaten it

Make two cakes: Eat one and have the other

nice hack stand-up comedy bits. who's this guy think he is, gallagher?

anyway, all my life, the "have your cake and eat it too" thing bothered me. it just seemed so nonsensical. then i found out that the expression was originally "you can't eat your cake and have it too." suddenly the sky opened up and i saw the light. the world made sense. and all was well.

Do you mean 'have it' in the biblical sense of the word? that would just be disgusting

Depends upon the cake...

this is hilarious

I'm having so much fun reading the article AND the comments

I think I've seen this somewhere before... or maybe this was the original. It's still fun to read though.

4. When people say "it's always the last place you look". Of course it
is. Why the hell would you keep looking after you've found it?

Hahaha, this is so great!
Can't stop laughing!

Good old Peter Kay!

If you yanks like this kind of comedy do a search for him, hilarious!