From American Zen teacher Cheri Huber.

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There’s nothing inherently good or bad about any of this, explains Huber. It’s just the way life happens. The hitch, she says, is that most of us have been conditioned to spend the vast majority of our active time and energy working exclusively in the final three steps. Acceptance is what teaches us to more masterfully observe the first two.…

When we are not in a place of acceptance, explains Huber, our experience goes something like this: We feel a desire; we act; we develop some type of story about what happened, and generally, we find ourselves right back where we started – confronted with the same (or a very similar) desire.…

"The point is not to try to judge or change or stop the cycle at any particular point," she clarifies. "It’s just to look at it and go, ‘Okay, what’s that about?’ The desire, the action, the story we tell ourselves afterward – all of it has to be ‘okay’ before any of it can change on a deep level."[/