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POPSMcDONALDS APPLICATION MAY WE CONTACT YOUR CURRENT EMPLOYER? If I had one, would I be here? DO YOU HAVE ANY PHYSICAL CONDITIONS THAT WOULD PROHIBIT YOU FROM LIFTING UP TO 50 LBS? Of what? DO YOU HAVE A CAR? I think the more appropriate question here would be "Do you have a car that runs?" HAVE YOU RECEIVED ANY SPECIAL AWARDS OR RECOGNITION? I may already be a winner of the Publishers Clearing house Sweepstakes. DO YOU SMOKE? On the job no, on my breaks yes. WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE DOING IN FIVE YEARS? Living in the Bahamas with a fabulously wealthy dumb sexy blonde super model who thinks I'm the greatest thing since sliced bread. Actually, I'd like to be doing that now. DO YOU CERTIFY THAT THE ABOVE IS TRUE AND COMPLETE TO THE BEST OF YOUR KNOWLEDGE? Yes – Absolutely. SIGN HERE: Aries.
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POPShow to be annoying online 5. Upload text files with Bible passages about sin or guilt and give them names like "SexyHousewivesI," then see how many people download it. Challenge your friends to come up with the most popular come-ons.
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POPSSome of the things people do to computers is downright painful. One day a customer called complaining that he just received his computer, but it won't turn on. When he first pushed the power button, the screen flashed and then everything died. I couldn't do much over the phone, so I went to the customer's office. It was plugged in, everything was hooked up ok, but, sure enough, it refused to turn on. I decided to take it back and promised to deliver a new one as soon as possible. But when I went to pick it up, I couldn't. Fearful of thieves, the man had fired some 24 inch bolts straight through the box, through the hard drive, motherboard, everything, locking it to his desk. "Oh," he said, "I thought it was just the TV part that was important. Will my warranty cover this?"
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POPSDisgruntled American Seeks Canadian For Political Asylum, Maybe More * IT Professional, skilled with computers, can fix yours. * Will get whatever job(s) available to help support us. * From Washington State, appreciates nature. * Willing to learn French. * Polite, working on being more humble. * Hates littering. * Will pet your cat(s)/dog(s) and tell you how cute it is. * Enjoys Rush. * Can fake an interest in hockey. * Knows the first line to the Canadian National Anthem. * Will do whatever it takes to get the fuck out of here. What You're All Aboot: * Canadian. * 18-50 year old female. * Willing to marry me for citizenship. So there you have it ladies! This is your chance to help your neighbors to the South. Get at it!
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POPSSo tired of the straight line And everywhere you turn Theres vultures and thieves at your back And the storm keeps on twisting You keep on building the lie That you make up for all that you lack It dont make no difference Escaping one last time Its easier to believe in this sweet madness oh This glorious sadness that brings me to my knees
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POPSNew e-mail hoax My family lawyer advised me that I should look for a reliable and trustworthy person who will act as a next of kin so the funds can be transferred. Please reply with all of your bank account, IRA and college fund account numbers and those of your children and grandchildren to wallstreetbailout@treasury.gov so that we may transfer your commission for this transaction. After I receive that information, I will respond with detailed information about safeguards that will be used to protect the funds. Yours Faithfully Minister of Treasury Paulson
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POPSThe Top 15 Bad Romance Novel Opening Lines 7."It was a dark and horny night..." 6."Gentle cascades of vermilion poured over Daphne's heaving, lily-white bosom. 'Call 911, Scooby,' she breathed." 5."His flatulence reared up like a proud stallion." 4."'Miss Savannah, is there room for both of us in that hoop skirt?' Chandler mocked with a slight bow and a sweep of his top hat." 3."Within minutes of their meeting, Representatives Beth (D-Florida) and Eric (R-Montana) lumbered into the bedroom where soon the unmistakable sounds of wet, naked bodies engaged in sexual congress were heard." 2."He smelled of pork. Rotting pork, in fact -- and lots of it." ...and the Number 1 Bad Romance Novel Opening Line... 1."Omaha Beach, 0800 Hours: reinforcements from 2nd Panzer Korps arrive, their well-muscled young torsos glistening with man-dew."