1
POPSDon't Portray Obama or Global Governance in a 'Negative Light' Obama's media liaison meets with Fox News (Satire) . Pardon, it just fits so well. Proof of appropriateness of this from this article here in Dec. 2008 It's a record-setting press honeymoon. President-elect Barack Obama has received the most positive campaign news coverage on the main network news shows in the 20-year history of such studies by the Center for Media and Public Affairs (CMPA). Wonder when the media, other than Fox, will end the love fest and start reporting people's fears and concerns about the Agenda , and without similar V tactics from the White House .
4
POPSBurn the Bible! I just wanted to note that I am in no way endorsing this article. I am just posting it for it's content.
2
POPSNew Seven Layer Whopper! Can You Handle it? This Windows 7 Whopper might be estimated at five times larger than a typical quarter pounder. Thus, if you do the math, this 7-layered Whopper could be using 7,000 gallons of water to produce (give or take, depending on the size of the patties). In a world running out of fresh water supplies (fossil water), that's a huge quantity to plow through in one meal.
1
POPSRadical Islamist to Lead Unprecedented March Mr Griffin also hailed the development, saying, "this move by the Pak.. I mean the radical Islamists demonstrates that the BNP is now the right choice for Britain's idiots. We stand now as a mainstream Party, offering the opportunity of quality multicultural unfairness to all Britain's morons. As part of the move the BNP's Constitution is to be reviewed to bring it more in line with the teachings of radical Islam. References to 'ragheads' and other potentially Islamic slights are to be removed, with greater emphasis placed instead on the disempowerment of woman. However, both men said they were in agreement that any bits about being Jewish could stay in place. Reports that the cleric intends to stand for Parliament remain unconfirmed.
2
POPS'Intoxicated' pilots flail to land A statement released by the National Transportation Safety Board (NTSB) said: "The crew told us 'isheh thehshs ussshe, ehhhh?'. We are hoping to get more from them after they dry out."
4
POPSHannibal Lecter's plan endorsed by Obama
President Obama had not released any details of his proposal, a proposal that many feared would have ended up under review by the Supreme Court, as it would seem to violate the entirety of the U.S. Constitution, not to mention being what he had campaigned against. That's when Dr. Lecter came out of his self-imposed seclusion to lend a hand. "If you simply bring me the detainees, I will house them in my secure basement facility, as many as I can accomodate, and distribute such that I cannot to...let us say...like-minded associates with proven experience in confinement methodologies.", said Dr. Lecter in a memorandum submitted to the White House yesterday. The "associates" the doctor refers to are believed to be a well trained and experienced group of psychopathic serial killers, who's basements have already been modified in a manner that would make a SuperMax seem like a child's playpen. Initial reaction was favorable, especially amongst Corrections officers from Leavenworth to Si
1
POPSAl-Qaeda Want Our Oxfam Shops "Without this education, many are committing suicide because they see no future for themselves", he sighed. "I'm sure you'll all agree this is a global tragedy and your money will help bring it to an end", he concluded. Many thanks...
0
POPSfar right leader Geert Wilders stuffs UK and enters legally, Sieg Heil! Geert is determined to prove he is not a racist or Islamaphobic and that he just hates the thought of Islam and Muslims taking over the "Master Races"! He only wants Holland to be Dutch, Germany to be German, France to be French, etc, and the UK not to be an American Colony! (too late, oops!) Anyway Geert and his SS are busy preparing for the invasion of the Isle of Man claiming the Dutch discovered it long before the Manx Cat and want's it back! The Isle of Man will then become a Muslim no-go zone (yes!!!!), a true celtic state, fly the flag of Oranje (pissing the catholics off in Northern Ireland!) and Margaret Thatcher will become the new Prime Minister holding hands with Mijnheer Geert Wilders over a "lekker kopje hollandse koffie en weed cake" (translation = nice cup of Dutch coffee and a piece of real Dutch "weed" cake!)! "Tot Ziens and see you in the UK" Geert smiled!
3
POPSSalman Rushdie should have got a prostitute' Last week, in her first interview since the split, a furious Pia accused Rushdie of being ‘cowardly, dysfunctional and immature’. Far from her being the one who made all the running in the relationship, it was Rushdie who pursued her for more than a year, she insisted. But once they had become lovers, she claimed, the great novelist showed little real interest in her, apart from sex and parading her around in public as a trophy girlfriend. She says he was also obsessed with his fourth wife, the beautiful Indian-American model and TV presenter Padma Lakshmi – and would begin the day by putting his own name into Google, the internet search engine, to see what had been written about him. Self obsessed little bollocks!
0
POPSMichelle Obama to get massive liposuction to reduce her ass size! Others mentioned that the real reason was the cost of retro-fitting 75 toilets in the White House to accommodate her large ass, as it would would cost taxpayers $10 million dollars! Ben Caudwelt, a spokesman for the President's environmental issues committee, re-assured green-minded supporters that all the fat that was to be removed from Obama's ass would be re-cycled into clean burning bio-diesel fuel and would be enough fuel to give the State of Illinois energy independence for almost a year! Al Gore issued his own statement in support of the Obama camp's 'green' effort and promised to talk to his wife Tipper about her helping Tennessee become as energy independent. The United Truckers Union has promised to have all union trucks using the special fuel display the signage....Ass For Gas! Proudly Powered by Michelle Obama!
0
POPSMembership In 'The Nobel Club' Has Its Privileges Great travel packages to the 2016 Olympics in Rio de Janeiro Listing in "Who's Who of Global Salvation" ($49.95 per copy) Great coupons for Olive Garden, P.F. Chang's, Six Flags Theme Parks, and more! Plus, you'll receive the exclusive Nobel Peace Player's Club GoldCard entitling you to discount air travel and 5-star hotel accommodations from Kyoto to Darfur. But don't take our word for it! Listen to these testimonials from some of our current members: "My career as an international peace activist means lots of air travel -- and dealing with pushy Zionists and rude natives. With my Nobel Peace Player's Club GoldCard, I finally get the respect I deserve - and it makes getting through Gaza airport security a snap!" -- Jimmy Carter, 2002 Laureate "Whether we're patrolling the Congo, Sudan, or Bosnia, one thing's for sure -- chicks can't resist a Nobel Peace Prize Player!" -- United Nations Peacekeeping Forces, 1988 Winners
6
POPS Chicago’s “Good Times” Canceled: DynOmite! All I have to say is, where the hell were our international protocol and intelligence teams? Why didn’t someone over at the State Department tell us about this Danish policy before we put everything on the line to bring the Olympic games to the capital of Pay-To-Play cities? We just assumed that we would be treated to the same fawning adulation and deference we get in the USA: the country that invented free speech. We arrived with soaring expectations, only to have the whole thing blow up in our face. Thanks, State, once again. I’m beginning to think that Hillary didn’t really want that job. Insults are under threat in many countries. The World Press Freedom Committee earlier this year published a survey, "The Right to Offend, Shock or Disturb," which details how laws against insults are being used to squelch free speech, including opposition to the government. http://online.wsj.com/article/SB20001424052748704471504574451712299324476.html
16
POPSHuman, All Too Human: one of the best series ever produced on philosophy is available on Google Video. The BBC series Human All Too Human includes three fantastic programmes on Friedrich Nietzsche, Jean Paul Sartre and Martin Heidegger
1
POPSNone Dare Call it Art When 40 months seem a heavy load And every day makes your head explode Read Ott and Steyn and Iowahawk And Life won't feel like such a crock. David Hussein Burge! Mmmm -- mmmm -- mmmm Thanks, DB, I'm proud as hell, Of America -- just like Michelle! We're finally rising from the pits Cuz we elected YOU the King of Wits! David Hussein Burge! Mmmm -- mmmmm -- mmmm! Is This for real? A contest? Panderhawk Oh, Iowahawk! Who leaps into action when all the other blogsters just talk? Iowahawk! Who rushes in where angels fear to walk? Iowahawk! Who packs more irony than any other kid on the block? Iowahawk! Who causes the targets of his incisive satire, whether high or low, left or right, real or imaginary, to throw up their figuratively blood-stained hands and squawk? Iowahawk! Oh, Iowahawk, Your intelligence compares favorably to sixties Star Trek character Spock! Your masculine beauty is without any flaw or pock!
5
POPSGeldof Sick of Scroungers I asked Sir bob if he had felt like this for so long why he had organised Live 8, he replied "its like when your partner always asks you to do something, the washing up say, you finally do it but do a really bad job and then hopefully you'll never be asked to do it again, that's why I hired Ricky Gervais, Madonna and let U2 release some doves I knew it was shite its what I wanted!" So another 1st: I finally uncover the real reason Live 8 was so shockingly bad. Geldof says, " To be quite honest, people like me and Bono etc. are just a bunch of self-serving fuckin' Irish gits, talking total shite and lining our pockets in the process".
1
POPSMichelle Omama and the secret Masonic symbols The swirling cellulite indentations revealed a complex code of Masonic symbols dating back to 1773 and showed various connections between the Freemasons, slavery, Michael Jackson's death, and a previously unrecorded landing of UFO's in pre-1865 Harlem! Author Dan Brown, falsely accused of selling a mish-mash theory, says he's felt vindicated by the news and cannot wait to see the photographic results showing the large ass-print. "Who knows, maybe there's a treasure map there too!"
2
POPSQaddafi/Gadhafi/Gaddafi/Qadhafi Brings His Stand Up Show To The UN
The View From Twitter Mark Knoller: If Qadhafi ever gives up the de facto leadership of Libya, could you see a talk show in his future? Andy Levy: Qaddafi: We are all pirates. Except for the pirates. America? Pirates. Israel? Pirates. Pirates? Not pirates. Ben Smith: RT @mkoshark: Gadhafi is set to close his #UN speech with a shameless plug to watch his stint on next season’s Dancing With the Stars Chris Lehmann: I’m assuming the aide responsible for giving an Attaboy to Qaddafi after that performance is now planning to defect. Mike Madden: RT @owillis:Qadafi: so this is what @glennbeck sounds like in a diff language. Jake Tapper: AND…Qadaffi’s done. Roughly 90 minutes of sheer poetry. Ben Smith: Qaddafi: You are the ones who hate the Jews. Mark Knoller: At 90 minutes into the Qadhafi speech, 2nd shift of UN translators come on duty. Mark Knoller: Qadhafi even has his own health care reform: accuses capitalist countries & companie
1
POPSTaliban Celebration Day For his innovative and courageous efforts, Al Boutmoub was awarded the prestigious Osama Medal consisting of two camels under a star and crescent moon. When asked about the meaning of the representations inscribed on the medal, no one actually knew, but one Taliban official claimed the 'Sheik' designed it by writing it in the sand with his urine stream.
2
POPSObama College Transcripts Leaked Another interesting course taken was Urination: Theory and Practice. The intellectual stimulating course taught Mr. Obama everything about urination from beginning to end. He was really hoping information about this course would never 'leak' out. Mr. Obama's most demanding course was Dictators and Democracy 401. In this course the future president learned to jut his jaw like Mussolini and to bow down to Saudi kings. He also got an A in this course. The president plans to take some post-graduate courses at Columbia after his term expires. He plans to take Speaking Without A TelePrompter 501, although he doesn't expect to pass it without a lot of work. President Obama also received an A+ in Clogdancing and a B in Origami.
8
POPS(satire) 10 things I'd rather do than get a Swine Flu vaccine shot #5) Base jump off a tall building with nothing more than a parachute made under the same quality control oversight as FDA-approved swine flu vaccines. #6) Be subjected to forced chemotherapy at gunpoint, just like all the other U.S. teens who are kidnapped by state authorities and forcibly injected with chemo. #7) Have all the superfoods in my pantry secretly replaced with MSG-laced processed food products made by Frito-Lay. #8) Work as a biological hazards disposal volunteer in the "superbug ward" of a local hospital. #9) Drink diet soda until my brain explodes from the aspartame exposure. #10) Get a public relations job at the White House where my sole responsibility is to show the brain-numbed masses how to stupidly sneeze into their own shirt sleeves.
2
POPSEarn Big $$$ the NEA Way! It's true -- U.S. government demand for art and art-like products has never been higher! Uncle Sam and the good folks at the National Endowment for the Arts are on the lookout for go-getting, obedient artists like you for a fast-paced career in state propaganda. With the quick and easy Federal Art Instruction Institute course, now you too can get a first class ticket on the federal art gravy train! Tell Me More! From heath care to the economy to the environment, Washington has become infested with pesky state enemies who are clogging up the legislative pipeline and making life miserable for our cool, art-loving president. That's why he has ordered the NEA to fund obsequious bohemians to help him exterminate the competition and drive traffic to his hip new website Servile.gov. The Federal Art Instruction Institute will show you how to get off funemployment and on the payroll of this exciting $3.6 trillion growth industry!
1
POPSObama Plan, Nation's Sick To Be Transferred to "Health Camps" Radical, experimental medical "procedures" would be made readily available as a means of attaining a final solution to a patient's problem, while also furthering the canon of medical knowledge for the doctors. The camps would also feature ample opportunity for physical activity outdoors, very condensed sleeping quarters to allow patrons to more closely interact with one another, and even luxurious "day-spas." These spas would let clients relax in an enclosed, private environment and breathe in the therapeutic mists which aromatically pervade the room. All of this to be enjoyed wearing nothing but a towel and with mud on your face. "It's a gas," said Obama of the spa facilities.
1
Pops
Newest Clips
Latest Comments
Most Pops
Print
Save
Turn on live update